It has been being tens months and I have already disappeared from this blog. Whereas this is used to be my remedy or medium for me able struggling day by day.

Hmm, it's not a good beginning for long-gone-me start to write. I'm trying not to be care. Not because I hate people, but I'm trying to put myself first--well, advice from many people.

Where have you been?

Life.

Trying to be able to stand day-by-day. Most of them, interacting with kids. Major excuses for leaving writing here. The minor one is challenging myself to write for people. Nonetheless, I still need for myself. I'm still doing rarely, not here.

However, life is confusing.
I'm saying it every day.

But nowadays, I said it countlessly like I'm an addictive one. Maybe, I'm finding affirmation to make me believe that sentence is totally wrong.

I pulled myself from some kind of lives. I said to myself that I need time. Life is quite tiring and terrifying and untrustworthy. If I could choose my own option, I wanted to hide somewhere that no one could find, until I was really ready to face the world.

Kinda terrified and easily-trust-but-easily-broke and indecisive and so on. I know the view of the world before is the result of my mind. I know. I need to fix my perspective but it's too... Hm, I don't find the exact words.

But if I choose to see the world, it's because I believe you. I believe people that accompany me.

Staying through my side.

Assuring that I'm going to be okay.

Thank you for being part of my learning journey.